'cause we was raised to have manners, you hear?

Almost every Sunday morning while I was employed at Victoria's Secret, I opened the concierge desk and worked for about an hour and a half or so on my own before another associate came in to work with me. Sundays were always quiet, and I rarely had more than a handful of customers. And on one of these mornings, a mom and daughter came up to the concierge desk to ring up their purchases.

I asked the daughter a question, I can't recall what it was. Probably one of those on the list we rattle off as each new customer walks up. "Did you find everything you were looking for? How was your shopping experience? Can we put this on your Angels Card?" And to whatever question it was, in response the girl, probably 18 or 19, said "Yes, m'am."

We chatted on for a minute or two, and as I was wrapping and bagging their things, I said, "So are y'all from the south?" The mom laughed, and said "How could you tell?" No doubt she was referring to their (I later learned) North Carolina accents, which were certainly thick and absolutely impossible to miss.

"Well," I said. "I'm from the south, too. And where I'm from, we always say 'yes m'am' and 'no m'am'. You don't get a whole lotta that around here."

We then shared a knowing look that seemed to communicate telepathically that the principal difference between us and them was that some of us were raised in a barn and some of us were not.

It is rare in this city that I come in contact with southerners, and it must be noted that the one thing I do miss about working at Victoria's Secret (besides the killer discount) is the bevy of different people from all different places I had the chance to interact with, southerners foremost among them. (You know you're bound to find a southern girl in an underwear store pretty much at any given time, because we all remember what our mamas told us about always wearing clean, hole-free underwear just in case you get into a car accident. Just imagine if they had to cut your Levis off with the jaws of life or whatever they're called and all of a sudden your holey old granny panties are on display for the entire county fire department and EMS team.)

Anywho. A quick dose of southern women shopping -- not to mention southern women in a big city -- is an excellent temporary cure for homesickness. Like these women.

Woman 1: Hey, we're tryin' to find y'all's Pank collechshun. (Pink collection.)
Me: Oh, I'm sorry m'am. We don't carry the Pink collection here. But you can find it at the 34th St. store, at Herald Square. It's really easy to get to.
Woman 1: Oh, do we have to take the subway? Ohhh, I don't know. Charlene, git over here.
Charlene: What is it?
Woman 1: We gotta take the subway to this other store to get those Pank sweat paints.
Charlene: Oh no, y'all. We are gonna get lost.
Me: No, it's really easy! All you have to do is turn left out of the front doors of the store, go to the corner of 59th and Lexington.
Woman 1: Hold own, Hold own. Charlene, we need to write this down.
Charlene: We do.
Me: Let me write it down for you, it's really easy, I promise. You just go into the subway station at 59th and Lexington, and get onto the N, R or W trains. They're the ones in the gold circles. You want to walk past the 4,5,6, which is the first thing you'll see when you get in the station.
Woman 1: Oh my gawd, Charlene, that is what we di-yud! That is what we did before that got us lost, I betchooo.
Charlene: Prolly so.
Me: Okay, so once you get to the N, R or W trains, you take the one going toward downtown, and you get off at 34th Street, which is Herald Square. Then you exit the station toward 34th Street and 6th Ave. and the store will be right there!
Woman 1: Okay, alright. So we take a left out of the store?
Me: A left out of the store, then to 59th Street.
Woman 1: Right, and then to the N, R, W trains, goin' downtown. Okay, alright. We can do this. Listen, honey, if we get lost we are gonna come right back here lookin' fer you!
Me: No problem, you're going to be fine! (The women start to walk away.)
Woman 1: Whispering to Charlene. Oooh, I don't know. Maybe we should just take a cab.


cheers y'all,
e. cawein