the hazards of looking this good

Oh my god, y'all.

So Wednesday when I went to the gym I decided I wanted to spice up my thigh work-out a little bit. Do something different. I've always been a fan of lunges, because they work so many different muscles at once and you can really feel it. So I did a couple laps around the little free-weights area at the gym, nothing crazy, with some 12-pound weights at my side. By the third lap I felt a little burn, but nothing major, so I evened it off at four and proceeded to my cardio.

Why, y'all? WHY DIDN'T I STOP WHEN I FELT THE BURN?

This morning my alarm went off at 7 a.m. so that I could hit the gym before work. I rolled out of bed and put on my gym clothes, and I felt some soreness. A tad stiff. But it was not until I got to the bathroom for my morning pee and had to brace myself on the bath tub to even sit down on the toilet that I realized just how bad things really were. It hurt to sit. It hurt to stand back up. Don't even get me started on walking. In fact, let's just throw that word out and replace it with waddling.

And since I rarely miss an opportunity to be wildly over dramatic, OH MY GOD, Y'ALL, THE PAIN. I need to clean the apartment and start packing for my trip home this weekend tonight, but frankly at this moment I would equate leaning over to pull that suitcase out from under my bed to being assaulted violently about the rear with an iron set to cotton and linens. And speaking with the experience of a person who once, some 20 years ago, put her index finger directly onto an iron set to cotton and linens, I can tell you that it is REALLY DAMN HOT.

Luckily, my evening plans -- other than the packing and the cleaning that desperately need to get done -- pretty much involve sitting on my ass and watching the NBC Thursday line-up. It doesn't require a tremendous amount of use of one's thigh (or ass, for that matter) muscles, except for those few glorious times when I waddle to the bathroom and try not to fall into my own toilet because I'm too disabled to pee.

I swanee.

cheers,
elizabeth